Far into the year 2011

There have many things I've wanted to write about but for so many lame excuses I haven't...until now.

Life lately has been interesting. My person life is great, Danny and I have gotten over obstacles that were thought impossible and we keep on keeping on. Lola is a ray of light that shines warmth into our days, she grows more and more every day impressing us and everyone with her intelligence, her wit, her energy, her pure infectious happiness. Although I've had to take time off from school I've found a job that challenges me and takes me beyond the limits that I thought I was capable of. But this job has consumed my days, it's been light years since I have been able to talk to my friends via Skype or even sit down for 15 minutes (besides now) in order to write them yet I think about them everyday.

But like I said life lately has been interesting. Everyday something in today's society makes me shiver fear. I lose my faith in humanity almost. Living in a country that is so beautiful but so corrupted makes me cringe. The worst part: nobody cares.

Call it lack of education, lack of culture, lack of tolerance, and compassion...I call it a lack of humanity.

When I look around at the little things that make me feel this way I get sad because I think that Colombia is the only country like this...then I remember no it's not. In fact Colombia may be better in many ways compared to others, thank goodness.

I realize everyday that everywere people are uneducated, arrogant, uncultured. That's the problem. If we see the world from the outside in, we realize it is complete chaos.

In the past four years Colombia has taught me more compassion, more patience, more tolerance. It has shown me all the characteristics that I would like to have. I have learned who to trust and who to walk past not because of arrogance but because of plain simple trust. Once upon a time there were moments that my naive character honestly believed that I could convince someone not to harm me because they were good. Easier said than done. I smile at how naive I have been and continue to be. A good friend once said naive is mistaken for compassion. That's when I admit I'm naive, ha! No, no, no but it's definately something that keeps me balanced.

I can only be all the things I want to see in humanity. I can only try to enstill these characterisitics in my daughter, teach her how beautiful life is regardless of the hateful chaos present, raise her to love all equally. That's my dream.